The Mt Kenya Times 
By: Wanjohi P. Mugambi
Worth Noting:
- Teenage is a time when teens tend to spend more time with friends than parents. So try and spend more time together just talking, or doing something.
- Have a chat with them often to know about their developing interests, hobbies, plans and other details of their life. Do not pry or force them to speak. Instead, gain their trust by believing them. When they trust you, they’ll tell you more.
- Your teenager can be annoying. But they still need your love and affection. So Be the loving parent they need to get through these challenging years. Show your love through actions, not mere words. Teens are independent and may not like it when you make decisions for them.
Teenage years are a struggle for most children, and it can also be a handful for you to parent them. Your child might be the best-behaved child until now, but the teenage hormones can make them chaotic. Thus, read on as we tell you all about parenting teenagers and help your children become the best version of themselves.
During the teenage years, your child goes through a roller coaster of emotions, and it can make them moody. They might also feel like you don’t understand them. Keep scrolling to learn how to raise teenage boys and girls efficiently.
Puberty is one aspect of adolescence. Puberty is the process of physical changes, which involves the development of sexual organs, the beginning of periods in girls, and facial hair growth in boys. Adolescence also encompasses emotional and psychological changes. Parenting a teenager in this growing phase can be challenging.
A child becomes an adolescent and also hits puberty during the teen years. So yes, they are going through a lot of changes that can be overwhelming for them Your teen may not be at their best when trying to come to terms with the changes. How they behave around you, talk to you and deal with you and the rest of the world also changes.
Teenagers’ behavioral changes could be a collective effect of hormonal changes and socio-environmental factors, including stress and isolation
They may act like the stereotypical teen or worse. What they do is their reaction to the changes that come with age. How you behave with your ‘rebellious, stubborn or wild’ teen is your response to them. Your response is the only thing you can fully control.
Often what seems like a decent chat with the teen can turn into a crazy argument at any moment. Such conversations are typical. In many ways, parenting a teen is similar to parenting a toddler going through huge developmental leaps. While a toddler may throw himself on the floor, a teen will use words, and sometimes not very nice. If you can remain calm, setting appropriate limits but not reacting with equal outrage, your relationship with your teen will develop in a healthy direction.
Teenage is a time when teens tend to spend more time with friends than parents. So try and spend more time together just talking, or doing something.
Have a chat with them often to know about their developing interests, hobbies, plans and other details of their life. Do not pry or force them to speak. Instead, gain their trust by believing them. When they trust you, they’ll tell you more.
Your teenager can be annoying. But they still need your love and affection. So Be the loving parent they need to get through these challenging years. Show your love through actions, not mere words. Teens are independent and may not like it when you make decisions for them.
So make it a point to involve them in decision-making. The decisions may not always be what they want, but at least they’ll be a part of the process. You can gain their confidence through this, and they are likely to share their plans with you.
There are things that you as a parent should avoid when communicating. These are Yelling, whining, or nagging them to do things, calling them names or patronizing them in front of their friends, arguing about everything to get your way just because you are the parent. A teen is a half-grown adult who needs a little guidance. They need limits set on their behavior. But making them a part of the conversation will work.
Your teenager wants to be heard and understood, not judged. And to be able to do that, you need to listen to them, support them, have fun together and respect each other. In short, your teen should be comfortable sharing stories about their experiences. Of course, the degree to which they share may vary greatly according to their unique personality. But for all kids, an open and accepting listening stance will best support a healthy relationship.
There will be times when you have to pull ranks and become the authority figure to say no. Parental authority has a critical role to play and should not be seen as negative. A teen will likely not thank you for setting limits, but when they sense that you have appropriate authority, it helps them feel safe as they navigate this often turbulent stage of development.
With a teen, conversations may easily transform into arguments. So you need to be the adult and pick your battles wisely. Figure out the things for which you want to say ‘no’ and those which you should just let go. For instance, Some parents may forbid a tattoo or body piercing. Others may feel that this can be a relatively harmless expression of independence if it is small and located in a part of the body that is not generally visible.
Relationships are among the many things your teen is exploring at that age. Adolescence is the age where they build meaningful friendships that can last a lifetime. During this time, your little girl or boy may also get attracted to members of the opposite sex and explore romantic relationships. In addition, they may be actively exploring their sexual orientation.
Face it. Your baby has grown up and is a teenager who stands five or six feet tall. They are not helpless children anymore and may not need you for everything. That’s okay. Even if you do not like it, you need to accept that they are soon going to be adults and won’t need hand-holding. So rather than getting angry that they are making their decisions (you won’t be able to stop them anyway), teach them to be responsible.
Be a good role model and take responsibility for things you do or mistakes you make.
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