The Mt Kenya Times 
Boitumelo Molefane
By: Boitumelo Molefane
Gaborone, Botswana
Allow people to unpack their pains. Allow people to process their emotions. Allow people to process their disappointments.
Moreover allow yourself to process your emotions without interruption or judgement.
Never close up the mouth of a person who is hurting. For once or maybe twice give them a ear and a heart- listen to them and hug them without judgement.
Do not even give them an advice if they did not ask for it, trust me they will figure their truth out as they pursue their healing. Let them process and unfold their emotions through all the stages of shock, denial, anger till they reach a stage of acceptance.
Acceptance is the peak of healing, it is the plot twist where direction shows up – I would say it is where real healing starts. Acceptance of the reality that you have lost your job, you have lost your loved one, you have lost your property does not mean what caused you pain was right.
At any point of your healing, choose a neutral person like a psychologist to pour yourself out. If you are not comfortable telling another person take a pen and paper to vent out. You will feel better and lighter.
Don’t even judge yourself if you make mistakes along the way of unpacking your emotions. Rather take care -not to subject yourself to exploitation -remember pain makes you vulnerable and that can cause you to add another layer into your life. Just never suffocate yourself.
If you suffocate yourself, there comes a time where hell breaks loose, and you can develop mental diseases or even heart diseases. You will vent on wrong people and end up destroying your whole life and other people.
Remember hurt people hurt others that are why you have to unpack your emotions and heal.
Personal development remain a constant that will sustain your healing is personal development.
Wake up early morning and run, run to sweat, take a good book and read, a motivational book especially a biography. Someone’s story might uplift you. Nurture your spirit through meditation. Be consistent with these entire all and embrace your healing journey.
It is a process, so be patient with yourself.
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