Confidence is something we all strive for, yet self-doubt often finds a way to creep in and make us question our abilities. There were times in my life when I doubted myself so much that I avoided opportunities, convinced that I wasn’t good enough. Whether it was speaking up in a group, pursuing a goal, or trying something new, the fear of failure held me back. I used to believe that confidence was something people were born with, but over time, I realized that it is something we build. Just like any other skill, confidence grows with practice, patience, and a shift in mindset. The key is not to wait until you feel confident but to take action despite self-doubt.
One of the biggest lessons I learned was that self-doubt is normal. Everyone, even the most successful people, experiences it at some point. The difference is that confident people don’t let doubt stop them. Instead of seeing doubt as a sign of weakness, I started seeing it as a challenge to overcome. I realized that my mind often created exaggerated fears—fear of failure, fear of judgment, fear of not being enough. But when I faced those fears head-on, I saw that they were not as powerful as I had imagined. Every time I pushed myself to do something despite my doubts, I proved to myself that I was capable.
Changing the way I talked to myself was another important step. I used to be my own harshest critic, focusing on my flaws and failures. But I realized that if I constantly told myself I wasn’t good enough, I would start believing it. So, I made an effort to replace negative self-talk with positive affirmations. Instead of saying, “I can’t do this,” I would say, “I am learning and improving.” Instead of focusing on what I lacked, I reminded myself of my strengths. It felt unnatural at first, but over time, my inner voice became more supportive rather than discouraging.
Taking action was the most powerful way to build confidence. Confidence doesn’t come from sitting around waiting to feel ready—it comes from doing. I started setting small challenges for myself, stepping out of my comfort zone little by little. Whether it was speaking up in a meeting, trying a new skill, or sharing my thoughts openly, each small step built momentum. Even when I failed, I realized that failure wasn’t the end of the world. In fact, every failure taught me something valuable and made me stronger. I stopped seeing mistakes as proof that I wasn’t good enough and started seeing them as part of the learning process.
Another thing that helped was surrounding myself with positive and supportive people. I noticed that when I spent time with those who encouraged me, I felt more capable and motivated. On the other hand, being around negative people who constantly doubted me only fed my own self-doubt. So, I became mindful of the energy I allowed into my life. I also sought inspiration from those who had overcome their own doubts to achieve great things. Hearing their stories reminded me that everyone starts somewhere and that confidence is built through experience.
Taking care of my mind and body also played a huge role in overcoming self-doubt. When I was tired, stressed, or unhealthy, my negative thoughts felt even louder. So, I made an effort to develop habits that supported my well-being. Exercise, meditation, and healthy eating helped me feel more energetic and focused. Even something as simple as standing up straight and maintaining good posture made a difference in how I felt about myself. When I treated myself with care, I naturally felt more confident.
Over time, I realized that confidence is not about being perfect or fearless—it’s about trusting yourself enough to take action despite your fears. Self-doubt may never fully disappear, but it doesn’t have to control us. The more we challenge it, the weaker it becomes. Building confidence is a lifelong process, and every small step adds up. By changing the way we talk to ourselves, taking action, surrounding ourselves with positive influences, and taking care of our well-being, we can grow into the most confident version of ourselves. I am still on this journey, but I have learned that confidence isn’t something we find—it’s something we create.
Sheila Awuor Ndong’a (Rongo university)
Similar Posts by The Mt Kenya Times:
- Mt Kenya Times ePAPER August 26, 2026
- Mt Kenya Times ePAPER August 25, 2026
- Mt Kenya Times ePAPER August 24, 2026
- Diaspora Times Global Aug 22 – Aug 28, 2026
- Mt Kenya Times ePAPER August 21, 2026
About the Author
